Setting Expectations - The Always and Never List

“Tell peo­ple what to expect and hold them to it with­out apol­o­gy.” — Your Oxy­gen Mask First

I often talk to peo­ple about one of the things key prin­ci­ples from Chap­ter 13 of my book – Teach Peo­ple to Meet Your Stan­dards - called the Always and Nev­er list. It’s a mini instruc­tion man­u­al about set­ting expec­ta­tions and what peo­ple need to do to work well with you.

As a leader, you need to be com­fort­able say­ing exact­ly what’s on your mind and to get your expec­ta­tions on the table. The best peo­ple want to work with you effec­tive­ly, but they won’t know how to unless you tell them. It’s not rock­et sci­ence. If you want peo­ple to do their best job pos­si­ble, you have to teach them to meet your stan­dards, with­out sur­pris­es or guess work.

Oth­er­wise, they start to make stuff up – and often miss the mark and get it wrong. We get too busy to say any­thing and get used to peo­ple dis­ap­point­ing us. That’s not fair to anyone.

One CEO I worked with hat­ed emails but because they are part of the nor­mal cul­ture, he didn’t say any­thing — and every­one emailed him. I only found out when he point­ed out that he loved work­ing with one par­tic­u­lar exec­u­tive. When I asked him why he said it was because he nev­er emailed him. He just sent him updates on What­sApp and worked with him on the fly. He loved it!

When I pressed, he admit­ted that he’d nev­er asked oth­ers to do the same. So, one by one, we edu­cat­ed his team. The CEO was hap­py and the team loved it because deci­sions were made faster.

In my world there are six things on my Always and Nev­er list:

1. The ²⁴⁄₇ rule – If we talk about a task or a project to get done, I expect the task to be com­plet­ed in 24 hours and the project, in sev­en days.
2. Be on time – A face-to-face meet­ing means arriv­ing 10 min­utes ear­ly, ready to go when the clock strikes the hour
3. When speak­ing – don’t start with the back sto­ry of a land far, far away. Give me the head­lines, then back it up
4. Emails – Nev­er expect that your job is fin­ished just because you’ve sent me an email. Arrange a time to review and talk. Con­verse­ly, when I send you an email, I assume you’ve got it – you don’t need to reply that you have.
5. Nev­er make excus­es and pass blame — Screw­ing up is OK but don’t slough off responsibility.
6. Don’t make me ask twice.

The Chal­lenge

• Draft your Always and Nev­er List with five or six things you wish every­one on your team would always do or nev­er do when work­ing with you
• Share it with peo­ple on your team
• Ask them to draft and share their lists with you and with each other.